This is sad---but true---
There is dignity in one leaving you in death--
There is NO dignity in being left--abandoned
It's the world's judgement--not mine. In the eyes of the Bible I am a widow---but the world does not recognize that truth.
I leave you with this---what are your thoughts about friends that lost husband's by death? and what are your thoughts about your friends that lost husbands by divorce?
5 comments:
Buddy of Mine.....I think, in my feeble mind, that it is two differnt kinds of hurt. When you lose a spouse to death, at least you know that the spouse had no control over that situation, yet your heart still hurts...in divorce, you are fully aware that the spouse did have a choice and cast care to the wind and created that hurt. AND not only do you have the hurt to contend with, you have to deal with the feelings of rejection and anger. So...I may be in the minority...but I think my hurt would be worse if I was left alone due the the choice of the other person...that's just my opinion. I luh ya, you know! Goosie
It seems that people have more empathy and sympathy for those who lose spouses by death. For those who divorce, it seems that even though there are some who "mourn with those who mourn" over the death of a marriage, there is much more judgment attached to those navigating through a divorce.
Just an observation . . .
I disagree. I think that people have more sympathy for someone abandoned by a spouse. When a someone loses a spouse to death, people will be sad for them but also maybe will admire or elevate their marriage...but when someone is abandoned, people feel awfully sympathetic for the one left behind...I think maybe you are projecting? You have hoards of people behind you, backing you and loving you!
I will say, though, that abandonment and divorce is messier and people don't feel as free to express their sympathy, condolences and support. They don't know what is appropriate or welcome, I think, and they don't want to cause pain.
When my Dad left my Mom after 33 years of marriage, it was by far the most painful thing I have seen her have to go through. I was 19, my sister was 27 with a new 6 month old and just like that...he left us...started a new life with a new woman. During the whole process, however, as painful as it was, the support and help was there from tons of people. With a death, I feel like people of course are sad and mourn for you and with you, but as time progresses the support takes a different form. With a divorce, people definitely rally together and stay apart of your daily life for a very long time...helping the pain ease. Unfortunately with a divorce, there is never closure...you have to constantly work through your emotions with no endings. With death, there is a sense of closure. BUT, I think that lack of closure really causes you to grow....God opens a ton of new doors for you, especially the ones that draw you closer to Him because that's all He wants. You are doing great, Ms. Lora! I am so very proud of you. And you have a huge support team that love you! Lonliness is a beast...but you are really never alone because He is always there.
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