IT'S NOT EASY BEING A SOUTHERN BELLE-EVEN AFTER YEARS OF PRACTICE!













Thursday, September 1, 2011

DROOPY!

Today has been an incredibly difficult day. I turned over the keys of the home I have lived in for 27 years this Labor Day. The only saving grace was the sweet family that will be moving in with 3 active boys and knowing how much those boys are going to love the Vienna abode and all the critters. Being told news that I knew was coming--but somehow still dreaded capped the day off. It was a relief to go to work---and another day I will post about just what I am doing--I KNOW you all are sitting with bated breath waiting--but really it's MOST interesting.

So instead of dwelling on my sadness and heartbreak---I instead will give you the other side of my under girding story. If you remember I recently posted about getting to the bottom of the basket of underwear and having to resort to spandex -----and it strangling me to death by the end of the day. Today---I have a quite different tale---NOW this is about underwear SO MEN--do any men read this ---well anyway---MEN don't be offended--you might have the same problem.

ANYWAY!----today I pulled out a pair of panties based upon the color they were (NO I do not wear all white panties!) If you know me---you know I have lost quite a bit of weight--if you don't let's just say I am down 3 sizes. SO I put on this lovely pair of panties--that fit sometime in the past. NOW in case you are not aware--elastic loses it's elasticity with time---anyway---the elastic is also NOT what it used to be. SO--I spend the day trying to delicately pull up my panties--without anyone really knowing what I am doing. This involves things like turning sideways and quickly jerking one side up--but then I'm uptight on one side and hanging low on the other. Then I tried the back into the file cabinet and rise up on your toes--that did NOT work. Finally I just went around the corner gave it a good jerk and kept on trucking. I was SO relieved to get home and the end of the day with no evidence ever being around my ankles! NOW THAT would have been a post.

I really decided on my way home that I didn't feel so bad after I saw this "Dude" on the side of the road with his shorts just above the things he really needs to cover and he has one hand holding them on while talking on his cell with the other as the traffic whizzes by. ONE BIG TRUCK and he would have been exposed to the world--literally!

2 comments:

Bethany said...

Sounds like the woman I saw today in Sam's Club adjusting her bra in the middle of the store not ashamed at whoever might see. You are amazing!

SND said...

You really need to write a column. You are too funny. And to think Suzanne rolled her eyes about me writing on Facebook about putting on my sports bra today by myself. Life is never boring for us!!!