TRUE STORY--I PROMISE

Let me say in the VERY beginning----I am in NO way making fun! I am sure this story carries a touch of sadness in it---but we have to laugh to make life bearable at times!

When I had my CPA practice, my partner left and was exploring other venues--so it was me, my loyal and trusted secretary, Dianne, & a part time accounting student in our office. Our building was located a block off the main downtown street and a couple of blocks away from a run down trailer park. The trailer park has since been sold and the university is expanding in that direction. At the time---it was a less than desirable neighbor.

This was about the same time that all of the mental health funds had been drastically cut in our state and across the nation. MANY individuals who REALLY needed to be in a hospital/managed care environment were turned out on the street. I think we have probably done a pretty good job of restoring many services currently---BUT at the time it was devastating. There were people on the street and in low income housing who really could not function in the day to day world.

Our office was set up very similar to a doctor's office. There was a sliding window in Dianne's office which she could open to greet clients and the hall door leading to the back and our offices was kept locked-WELL most of the time anyway for security reasons.

This lady started stopping in our office while walking from the trailer park to town to get cigarettes. She was obviously one of the patients that had been put out on the street. She would come in and ask to borrow money---we later found out to buy her cigarettes. Dianne was afraid of her----she was pretty delusional. I used to laugh and say----"Dianne! LOOK AT HER"!!!! We can be out the back door and running down the street before she can get herself through that window! I am PRETTY SURE We (well me anyway--every woman for himself) can out run her!"

Dianne really came unglued the day that she told her she was "The Virgin Mary". Dianne misunderstood and thought she said "Bloody Mary". I can hear her stuttering even now when she made that pronouncement.

We make some inquiries and found out the lady was going all over town asking for money. Cigarettes--drugs---not really sure---but she showed up regularly all over town.

Dianne's sister was a loan officer at one of the banks in town. The lady stopped by several times to apply for a loan. Pam was a sharp wit and a quick thinker. She turned her down several times. The day finally came when the lady told Pam that she was Jesus Christ and needed to borrow some money. Pam coolly looked at her and said, "Go back and ask your Father if he will co-sign and then we will see about the loan." The lady left and never came back.

SAD BUT TRUE!