I have had the privilege to be asked to shop for an 11 year old girl whose mother is addicted to drugs and her Auntie is raising her. It breaks my heart to even think about how she must feel--but I have the wonderful honor to shop for Christmas for her.
I went flying to Monroe tonight with Debbie and Helen in tow to shop after a LONG week. I must admit--I REALLY DID NOT WANT TO GO TO MONROE---but after getting in the store and starting to shop for her---it was all joy---What fun---to once again play Santa Claus and for someone that has so little.
THIS is what it is all about!!!
Friday, December 9, 2011
Thursday, December 8, 2011
THE LATEST IN OFFICE EQUIPMENT
Going back to work has been quite the adventure! I put myself "Out there as a "Consultant". NOW not just ANYONE can be a consultant! You need to have YEARS of experience===you know---have gone down the road of "The Good, The Bad & The Ugly". Wisdom comes from trampling that road----intuitive awareness---it does not come from the Yellow Brick Road---but more like the school of hard knocks. You have made mistakes--but you learned from them--you are willing to share that knowledge and experience.
I currently have 3 different jobs going on at once. The really interesting thing---I have a ROLLING file cabinet----MY CAR. It works quite well--MOST of the time. The front seat has the ECR files---the back right seat of the car has TB files---the back left seat has DH---I have it down to a fine science---PULL UP to the business---open the appropriate door---pull out the files---IN YOU GO with the laptop filled backpack in tow.
ONLY trouble is---SHORT STOPS---things go flying---WHAT A MESS!
I currently have 3 different jobs going on at once. The really interesting thing---I have a ROLLING file cabinet----MY CAR. It works quite well--MOST of the time. The front seat has the ECR files---the back right seat of the car has TB files---the back left seat has DH---I have it down to a fine science---PULL UP to the business---open the appropriate door---pull out the files---IN YOU GO with the laptop filled backpack in tow.
ONLY trouble is---SHORT STOPS---things go flying---WHAT A MESS!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
WHAT IF------
In Small Group---we are studying the book "Hearing God"' tonight we talked about what if you heard God speak in an aloud---audible voice---what would He say---What would His voice sound like? I have often thought I heard from God---but I must admit---I have not heard His audible voice---
Would it be booming-
Would it be the soft whisper of the evening breeze--
Would it sound like a man--
Would it have an authoritative resonance--
Would it be the gentle whisper of a lover in your ear--
What would God's voice sound like?
Would it be booming-
Would it be the soft whisper of the evening breeze--
Would it sound like a man--
Would it have an authoritative resonance--
Would it be the gentle whisper of a lover in your ear--
What would God's voice sound like?
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
THE WHYS?
We all have "Whys" in our life.
I had a co-worker that I noticed was unusually quiet and subdued today---when I asked her was she alright--she replied, "No". I then followed through with "Work or personal?" It seems her husband died unexpectedly today-2 years ago.
I have another sweet friend that lost her precious granddaughter this week. SO tiny---and yet perfectly formed---here but for a short time---and now gone.
My sister in law has had a re-occurrence of her breast cancer --five years after her original diagnosis and now she has had to change chemo twice searching for an answer.
My friend's brother in law died suddenly and unexpectedly recently at 57.
My father died when I was 14.
After sharing 38 Christmases ---with a husband---this year he will not be with me---
The Whys of Life
I had a co-worker that I noticed was unusually quiet and subdued today---when I asked her was she alright--she replied, "No". I then followed through with "Work or personal?" It seems her husband died unexpectedly today-2 years ago.
I have another sweet friend that lost her precious granddaughter this week. SO tiny---and yet perfectly formed---here but for a short time---and now gone.
My sister in law has had a re-occurrence of her breast cancer --five years after her original diagnosis and now she has had to change chemo twice searching for an answer.
My friend's brother in law died suddenly and unexpectedly recently at 57.
My father died when I was 14.
After sharing 38 Christmases ---with a husband---this year he will not be with me---
The Whys of Life
Sunday, December 4, 2011
HOW YOU CAN HELP---
I've been thinking about where I am and where MANY others are during this holiday season and what you might do to help. Yesterday I had 2 sets of dear friends just show up---one with a hot toddy for my cold and a nice visit and the other with good conversation and a listening ear that told me I could just be who I am at this time and understanding of my broken heart and tears. This led me down the road of what has helped and what has not---I KNOW all have good intentions---but here--from my personal point of view is what I have found-- HOLIDAYS especially are EXTREMELY difficult--
What you have known for years---the traditions---the expectations---all of it---has to change---NOW I KNOW that a new normal will come with time---but for now--I am grieving what is lost.
To those that say "I am strong" and "You will be fine"---NO right now--I am not strong---and I am doing all I can to just put one foot in front of the other. I understand that you want me to be strong and you want me to move on ---but for today---I am a mess emotionally---still crying daily---still grieving. Your expectation of me "Being Strong" makes me feel like a failure --AGAIN----I know you do not intend that and are trying to help by reminding me that I am strong---but perhaps you are reflecting your expectations of me and not accepting me for where I am and helping me to return to "strong" at the speed that I can manage.
If you think "I am better off"---perhaps I am---but for now I am mourning the wonderful past and all those years of oneness with another. I would just like to magically turn back the book to 3 1/2 years ago. My desire is to have someone by my side that has shared a lifetime of memories with me to remember them, speak of them and cherish each moment of our life as a family. The day may come when I think--yes, I am better off---but for today---my heart is aching for what was.
"Count your blessings"---yes I am blessed--FAR more than most are and I fully realize that---I acknowledge that God has showered blessings upon me-including sustaining me in the dessert---but read Psalms---David was certainly blessed--including the blessing of being the fore bearer of The King----but yet he grieved, he called out to God, he asked for righteousness to prevail---all very human responses to betrayal.
So what can you do---for a friend who is grieving during the holiday season? What will help---a kind word, a pat on the back, a surprise visit, an invitation to dinner--accepting where they are--and not trying to make it better---just being a friend.
Many MANY have done very well at doing just this for me---praying and telling me---being my friend and I am thankful for that. I guess the bottom line is just accept those around you during this time of the year for where they are and if God gives you a nudge or an open door to help--grab the opportunity. Yes-it will get better---yes I will stop crying all the time---but it will never be the same and finding the new normal is very hard. Just bear with me and I will always thank you.
What you have known for years---the traditions---the expectations---all of it---has to change---NOW I KNOW that a new normal will come with time---but for now--I am grieving what is lost.
To those that say "I am strong" and "You will be fine"---NO right now--I am not strong---and I am doing all I can to just put one foot in front of the other. I understand that you want me to be strong and you want me to move on ---but for today---I am a mess emotionally---still crying daily---still grieving. Your expectation of me "Being Strong" makes me feel like a failure --AGAIN----I know you do not intend that and are trying to help by reminding me that I am strong---but perhaps you are reflecting your expectations of me and not accepting me for where I am and helping me to return to "strong" at the speed that I can manage.
If you think "I am better off"---perhaps I am---but for now I am mourning the wonderful past and all those years of oneness with another. I would just like to magically turn back the book to 3 1/2 years ago. My desire is to have someone by my side that has shared a lifetime of memories with me to remember them, speak of them and cherish each moment of our life as a family. The day may come when I think--yes, I am better off---but for today---my heart is aching for what was.
"Count your blessings"---yes I am blessed--FAR more than most are and I fully realize that---I acknowledge that God has showered blessings upon me-including sustaining me in the dessert---but read Psalms---David was certainly blessed--including the blessing of being the fore bearer of The King----but yet he grieved, he called out to God, he asked for righteousness to prevail---all very human responses to betrayal.
So what can you do---for a friend who is grieving during the holiday season? What will help---a kind word, a pat on the back, a surprise visit, an invitation to dinner--accepting where they are--and not trying to make it better---just being a friend.
Many MANY have done very well at doing just this for me---praying and telling me---being my friend and I am thankful for that. I guess the bottom line is just accept those around you during this time of the year for where they are and if God gives you a nudge or an open door to help--grab the opportunity. Yes-it will get better---yes I will stop crying all the time---but it will never be the same and finding the new normal is very hard. Just bear with me and I will always thank you.
Friday, December 2, 2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
SO SORRY!
So sorry to all that responded---but no birthday party/Christmas Open House this year---perhaps next---Promised I would not talk anymore about it--
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